Walking along the Nile last week, slipped in some mud & seriously sprained my arm!

A really sweet worker bee, who spoke no English, carried & washed me off, tore apart a shirt to bandage my arm & then put me in a taxi. Incredibly sweet!

Then headed to a pharmacy where I was ushered into a closet with a guy holding a syringe motioning I lift my skirt... thinking this not a good situation... especially with my little red thong on underneath... demanded a woman give me the shot. But never found out what the damn shot was for! The bandage, a cream for my arm & shot cost less then a bottle of shampoo also bought...

A week later, still in pain & my wrist looking rather deformed, decided it was xray time.

My hotel recommended an orthopedic hospital 10 minutes away. Got there & immediately had an English speaking staff member become my personal escort. Paid $3 for the doctor's visit then $5 more for an xray. Then escorted back to the doctor, but now there's about 7... think every doctor in the place wanted to see the blonde girl... & I get the bad news, fractured my wrist & need surgery to put pins in.

Even worse news, its $600 & yes, tried bargaining.

On the upside, they'll squeeze me in that afternoon & I'll be home that night.

Leave to get the money & clear my head...I'm pretty shaken & scared! Minutes from the hospital run into an American EMT who I'd met a few days ago & just happened to be headed to a hospital to see their facilities. She & her colleague say they'll gladly come back & hold my hand...my angle of mercy!

When I get back (& fork over the cash) I'm taken to a plush private room & all the nurses gush over me. Two in particular couldn't stop kissing my cheeks & forehead. Even though none of them...except the head of nursing, who personally came to offer her help... spoke much English.

When I'm finally wheeled to surgery, without my EMT friend, all 7 of the doctors are there. But the nurses are very concerned something else is wrong with me... the bottom of my feet are red! I've got new red shoes & only after they wash my feet do they believe it's from my shoes!

Given a little anesthesia, I'm put in a room & one of the doctors comes in & tells me he would like to live in America, will I marry him?! Not wanting to piss off one of the guys about to cut me open, tell him I'm not going back to America.

Then I'm wheeled into the OR & there's about 20 guys... & one doc asks if I like to get drunk... which is a sign of a loose woman... now I'm thinking they're gonna rape me when I'm under...so I say "guy, guy, guy... what no girls? Could I please have a nurse in the room?"

A nurse comes & I'm given the major anesthesia... as I'm going under another doc asks if I like Bush & is it Israel or Palestine...I yell out "Bush is evil & so is Israel" & proceed to pass out thinking if that's the wrong answer they might kill me.

But guess it was acceptable... I survived.

When I finally come to, my American EMT angle of mercy is standing over me. I just want to sleep, so I thank her & tell her she can leave. But first we must say a prayer...she had a weird story, think she was actually a missionary or cult member.

Then my nightmare begins.

Sleep some, then wake in major pain & hungry & thirsty. Wasn't allowed to eat or drink all day. But none of the nurses speak English. And I find out "Ouch!" doesn't translate. I start crying...that translates. I get a good shot but I'm still dying of hunger & thirst. And what I can understand is that there is a cafeteria, but it's closed...nothing's available.

So I try to leave. Besides, I'm starting to have a panic attack & balling like a baby. Another patient's father, who speaks some English, gives me a gross liver sandwich...which I eat in desperation...tap water...which I drink in desperation & a cigarette...which I smoke in the middle of the nurses' station. And I should add that the nurses were very sweet, stroking my hair & hand & telling me in sign language that they are my family.

Finally go to sleep. A few hours later, I'm woken by a swarthy looking junior doc who runs some tests & hangs around like he's waiting for the loose western woman to pull him in bed. When he does leave, try locking the door, it doesn't... sleep with one eye on the door.

Then at 4AM, the swarthy guy & one of the docs from surgery, who speaks perfect English checks me out & tells me I can leave at sunrise.

But at 6AM, I try leaving & rude nurse tells me I must stay 'till noon. Again, flip out... find a service elevator & escape to the first floor where I'm caught & brought to a Harvard educated doctor. He gives me a cigarette & has someone bring us something like Starbucks & a croissant. He also explains the people who do paperwork come in at 8AM... he entertains me 'till then.

At 8 I'm taken back to my floor & asked to wait 30 minutes, then 30 more & 30 more. Meantime, the nurses put makeup & a headscarf on me. But I'd rather pace the floor...& at 10AM walk out again but am taken to an office where the paperwork finally begins. I'm taken -literally- to a dozen offices, each time given Turkish coffee & cigarettes & questioned about US foreign policy. Shaking from the caffeine, nicotine & tough talk, I'm finally out the door at noon.

Amazingly, with a $200 refund...total cost, just over $400!

But this is a never-ending story...have to have weekly xrays & will have the pins removed in 3-4 weeks. So gotta stick around Cairo awhile.

Can't believe it, been here in Cairo 2wks...done nothing at all but the time's flown by! Really, really love Cairo! Definitely the most livable city I've stayed in yet! Modern with an underlining exoticism.

Been havin' an utter blast without doing much. Finally went to the famous Egyptian Museum today...but there was too much stuff... gotta go back! Also went on a felucca boat for a sunset sail on the Nile the other night. But other than that, the only somewhat touristy things I've done is go to "trashtown" where garbage collectors live & the city of the dead where people have moved into a cemetery -- complete with laundry hanging on headstones! If you've been following this trip, you've probably noticed my strange fascination for poverty & death~

But still haven't taken the 10 minute metro ride to see the pyramids...

What I've really been doing, is simply hanging out with great company. Met many American students learning Arabic here... brilliant guys from schools like Georgetown & Yale...& a very cool American expat... & while they're definitely making the whole experience even better, it's the hours spent sitting in alley cafes smoking a water pipe (sheesa) & learning Arabic from the shopkeepers that's the best. I'm now completely fluent in the sheesa vocab! Not ready to quit, but eventually gonna need a 12-step sheesa program :)

Got stoned! No, not drugs... I'm talking about the biblical throwing rocks at the heathen woman! Nothing too serious, no pain but still... pissed me off!

Went & bought a headscarf post stoning. About 90% of the women here wear 'em. Which is interesting because just 10yrs ago 90% of the women didn't. Islamic fundamentalism grown fast. But I've got fantastic hair... (if I do say so myself...) so my own vanity keeps me from wearing it except at night out alone. Been grabbed & inappropriately rubbed against enough that I walk rudely with one hand out, like "don't you dare even get close to me." Also tried hiding behind local families but then they would yell back at the guys making their catcalls in Arabic, which only made me more aware of the comments being hurled at me...decided ignorance really is bliss.

But despite the guys, still really, really love Cairo. Even looked at an apartment last week!